Today I am going on a diversion.
Going way beyond this blog to touch on another. To digress from writing about my island Barbados and share my love of intrigue.
In an age of kingdoms today is all about writing storytelling fiction………truths.
I like creative writing that puts you on the edge mentally or even emotionally as you dream up your own fears and storylines from the prompts of the writer’s (or blogger’s) words. Thrillers, detective stories, mysteries….
With storytelling when we suspend disbelief we enjoy the story more, and sometimes see truths. When we suspend belief we simple wander into a world of suspended animation. A twilight zone that appears to give credence to the maxim “the real world …. is merely shadows.”
“Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away.” Philip K. Dick, 1928-1982 in I Hope I Shall Arrive Soon.
Every story has its beginning, its middle, and its ending. And every blogpost is its own short story. This one is based on someone else’s blog and a bit of freaky Imagination, sometimes referred to as creativity.
It all began with me pondering how can our readers get to know us, and what perceptions do they draw from our writing that we ourselves cannot detect? Even when we write about ourselves they might glean and surmise and form opionions that we may not intend, creating a ‘persona’ of us like that of a character in a story.
In the middle of all this, a diverting question: What fake news about us are our readers able and willing to conjure or digest?
Now to the end, the grand finale, the digression. Do we exist apart from our writing/blogging or are we one with it? Are you the real subject matter of your blog?
Given my predeliction for thriller mystery creative writing, I had been reading a blog by Jacob Edwards which is a collection of simple stories under two sections, Friday Fictioneers (based on a WordPress writing prompt) and Short Stories. As a whole they are tales of ‘darkness’. What in film might be termed noir, an intrigue of what can be imagined and what can be real.
All the short stories are better than good. I know this from the fact that though seemingly written lightly they are simply heavy; and from the defining fact that the posts do not use a lot of pictures, letting the images awaken creatively in us by the prose. It’s all in your mind. Make of them what you will.
Jacob’s last post on his blog was gone. In it he lets us see his fictional character’s reconciliation with the past and his future – or non-future. It is a final chronicling of his acceptance of how things were and what he wanted to do.
It was written on the 29 July. Not a word since then.
As I thought about it, I grew as excited as any mystery writer stumbling upon a brilliant convoluted plot. What could I draw from this coincidence? I could venture into the world of this same noir storyteller and create a truly dire scenario where all along his stories and various characters were merely glimpses of himself!
He was this guy trapped in his dark world, and storytelling on WordPress was a kind of game where he could share bits of his battering life and bloodsoaked thoughts. What if the Short Stories and those Friday Fictioneers posts were his way of communicating with a world outside that where he was ignored and nelected like Steven, in Age of Kingdoms? What if it was really him?!
Then, of this ‘real’ character all I can say is:
His WordPress blogposts was his only “victory” in a life of nothingness forgetfulness and darkness. It makes good reading, and you won’t see it as a cry for help. He knows there is none, not really, or he no longer wants any. He has found his nadir in his writing. He succeeded in the greatest feat of his life, to live a little cleanly, even as he was preparing to die. A personal victory, to have been finally in control. To have tasted acceptance? No. Rather acknowledgement of his existence in a world more real than the virtual games he played.
Because the blogging world has people with real personas, real identities, and to have them acknowledge like and interact with his was his one true success.
I know he never laughed at us, but was grateful and as happy as he could be. He was alive, noticed as a person ( a blogger/writer) with a title. We were his “friends” with whom he could communicate freely even if only via his pseudo-fictional tales. After all, he didn’t want to distress us, he didn’t want us to feel sorry for him and pity him, he didn’t want to bully us. He wanted us to act as regularly normal towards him as we would any other (writer/blogger) person.
The WordPress community is filled with real people. He reached out to us and we responded. I am thankful that we did.
R.I.P Jacob Edwards. You are no longer “gone” but demised.
Thank you for sharing with us atomic scribbler. 🙂 rip.
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Age Of Kingdoms is a beautiful piece. Read it and let me know how the final words: “You Are Victorious” leave you.
Is Jacob playing with our mind? And what is a hydrogeologist anyway?
Jacob Edwards’ WordPress blog Atomic Scribbles .